Just when you think you really know someone. . .

I thought I knew my husband intimately. Better than anyone else on this planet. He is fairly predictable (in a good way) and I can usually guess his next move/ wild idea / conspiracy theory before he even utters a word about it. I can usually predict how he will respond to events and how he will react to almost any situation. I thought I had him down pat. Then, last night he said a few words that would shatter that belief forever. Last night I realized that I have no idea who this man is that I sleep next to every night. I realized that I am married to a complete enigma.

We (me, David & my brother) were walking down the street to go to dinner when out of no where he says the following sentence. (Which I cannot believe I am divulging to other people; I am so ashamed by this):

"Hey guys, Have you seen the new Taurus?"

I twisted my head over in his direction quicker than Ray Charles.

Maybe I misheard him. Or maybe he got tongue-tied and said the wrong make of car.

But the look on his face was one of painfulness. Like it was hurting him to be saying what he was truly saying. And at that moment I knew that those words really did come out of his mouth.

Believe it or not, it gets worse . . .

He immediately followed up with, "They look pretty sweet."

Oh goodness. I thought I was going to fall over into the road. I got lightheaded and a little faint.

Millions of questions flooded my brain: Who is this man?? A Taurus?? Where did he come from?? The 1980's company car?? Where is the man that I married??

I looked to the sky and screamed in utter horror.*


(*Editor's Note: Okay, yelling at the sky only happened in mind. In fact, I was rendered completely speechless thus unable to make ANY noise, but if I had been able, I WOULD have screamed to the sky in horror.)